The Tovsky Tribe

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Sunday, March 5, 2017

A Letter to my Son on his 2nd Birthday!


Dear Decker,
The happy 2 year old

Happy 2nd birthday!!  2 years happy.  To say how hard it is to believe, though true, seems unnecessary because the passage of time continues to blow me away.  As does watching you grow and become your own person. Yesterday, when I asked you if I could take a picture of you on your last day of being one, you stopped mid-step, said Yes, then gave me a great smile.  Perhaps you knew what I was talking about because, typically, I can't take pictures of you because the minute you see my phone you want it.  You must have it.  You will whine and cry until you get the "phoney."  You can use it like a pro, finding your favorite apps, your favorite YouTube videos, and swiping any texts that come in right off the screen.

Today you woke up to balloons (one of your favorite things) and hugs and kisses and the surprise of Mom-Mom Jill, who had spent the night.  Then you spent the day with Uncle Mat (another of your favorite things) before coming back home for a quick dinner and cake before heading out to synagogue for Chase and Ryder's gimel shabbat.  You had cake.  We sang to you.  You were happy.  You also celebrated with cupcakes and your friends in school yesterday.  And, next weekend we will celebrate with your grandparents, your aunts, uncles, and cousins.
Last day of 1

The last few weeks you have been every bit the two year old you now officially are.  Adding new words to your vocabulary on a daily basis; crying if we tell you no; throwing books and other things across the room; touching everything; climbing most things; finding fascination in the smallest things; repeating the same things, daily, whether it be a routine or an episode of your favorite show; and laughing and making us laugh with ease.

Aunt Amy reminded me this morning that the day you were born it was a cold and dreary day.  There was an ice storm outside (that caused her and the girls to have a 2 hour ride to meet you) and a blizzard was en route.  I wasn't fully aware (or at all aware) of what was doing outside.  But, as Aunt Amy said, you were the only ray of sunshine that day and, Decker, at 2, you continue to be just that- A constant light in the room!  As the world perpetually changes- in our family we have had job changes, divorce, more babies born, bat mitzvahs, and more- in the world, we have had war, and economic volatility, Trump has, somehow, become our President and more- and yet, Decker, no matter what is going on around us you remain to be this little pocket of joy that can be taken with me where ever I go and, ultimately, joy gets spread.  It is quite a gift you have and I am beyond honored to be the person you call mommy.  Justin Timberlake wrote a a song called Can't Stop This Feeling, which I love.  In the song he refers to the Sunshine in his pocket.  That is you, Decker, everyday.  I love this song.


You are becoming quite the talker and are always saying new words and sometimes stringing two or three together.  You are constantly choosing a new word you hear from any of us to mimic, and add it to your vocabulary.  You say many words perfectly, and have come a long way from "ball" and "bubble", but you also have your own word for many things and if someone doesn't know your language they will have no idea what you are referring to.  For example, you know a dog when you see one.  You can point to one, chase after one, find one on a page in a book, or choose the dog puzzle but you always call a dog a "far far."  It is hilarious and I sometimes find myself calling dogs farfars, as well.  Two weeks ago we were in the Poconos with Uncle Rob, Aunt Jamie, Max, Leo and Sulky.  We had a great time and you spent a good amount of time chasing Sulky around the house calling "far far, far far."  You also know the shape star but consistently call it "high" while putting your hand up to the sky.  I assume you got this from Twinkle Twinkle Little Star because I always point up to the sky at the line "up above the world so high."  There is also Bah-bah-bah, which is banana, and should not be confused with Babba, which is Yo Gabba Gabba and "bebe" is actually what you say for a go-go squeeze, which you love.  Although you used to call milk,"Achun" you have recently learned to say it properly and can ask it for endearingly by saying "milky."  If you want to watch Imagination Movers, one of your favorite shows, you say "Tat-a-Tat" and refer to the book "Blue Hat, Green Hat" only by its hilarious point of "oops!"  Balloons are "La-loons" and though you can say "Cake" perfectly clear we should not confuse it with how you ask for ice cream, which is "cuuk."  You can say "Chase" and "Ry-yer" but Turner you called "Cock-er" until just the other day.  When you want to draw or color you will say "d" but when you ask for the markers it is "these."
And by far far I mean dog

He finally get's it right!  "Turner"

But, communicating with you is easy, even before you had so many words you had a way of letting us all know what you wanted or needed.  Whether it was a pull to the finger or the look in your eye or the motion of your hands, we always knew. And, now, as you string the words together to form near sentences it is such joy when you sit on the floor, look me right in the eye, tap your open hand on the ground next to you, smile, and say "sit. come play."  And, when I do it is always great fun that eventually leads to us laughing and you lifting your arm in the air and hitting the ground as you bend over, your way of saying "that is hilarious!"

You are a master at puzzles and have learned to match your colors and shapes flawlessly.   Although you typically answer blue first for most colors you know blue, red, black, purple and yellow by name.  You can only say the shapes "heart" and "high" (star) but can place all of the shapes into the proper sorting holes or puzzle spaces without fail.  You love books and enjoy the Barnyard Dance and "swinging your partner," "sliding with sheep," "Bowing to the horse," and "Leaping with the frog."  You also love Barney and watch the show and read our Barney book every day.  You like "choo-choo's" and kicking and throwing balls.  You like jumping on the small trampoline"boline" and playing basketball. You love the marble run (and so do I) and playing with the toy kitchen.

Three days a week you go to school with Ms. Donna and enjoy being with Grace, Casey, and Phoebe- whose name you say constantly.  On Friday's you still go to the best school around, Uncle Mat school, and are not easily dragged away on Friday afternoon.  And, Tuesday is my day with you.  My favorite day of the week. The one day I know I get to spend some one on one time with you and I love it more each week even if it is sometimes overtaken by errands.


You have your little "tricks" that you like to do, probably because it makes us laugh.  When you want to watch Teletubbies you stomp your feet on the ground; if we tell you to be a gorilla you pound on your chest; or an elephant, you do a raspberry noise while moving your arm like a trunk.  You can be a monkey with an "ooh ooh aah" and a giraffe by blowing up your cheeks and sticking out your tongue, a face you learned from the Charlie Monkey book.  You know what a rooster says, and will imitate the "cock a doodle doo," always with a pointed finger in the air, and your "meow" sounds very much like a real cat.  But not all of your tricks are animal related. You can hang from the pull-up bar, and ask to do so regularly.  You like to play "whoa" which is jumping on and being pushed down on Turner's bed.  You like to hide in the cabinet of your dresser, ask me to close the door, then crack up laughing when we knock on the door and open it up.  Often when we open it you are using the cabinet bar as another pull-up bar.  You can dab, but you think to dab is to wave, and explode fist bumps and give high fives.  You love to watch your favorite shows in the same spot in the living room.  You take the black chair and knock it over and sit in between the leg bars.  Every time.  It is rather adorable.  You love to watch and to feed the Froggy and the Fishies and have made it a part of your bedtime routine.  You love the "Barney, Follow Me" book and will follow me as I follow Barney's moves.  Your favorite part is when we do "scared as can be" which we imitate by putting the tips of our fingers in our mouth as if we are shaking.  When you go to sleep, usually without much hassle, you insist on your blanket having the design side up, and I have to blow lots of kisses under the blanket and trap them so that they can tickle your cheeks all night while you sleep. And, every single car-ride includes you taking off your shoes and your socks and, many times, chucking them across the car!

Your television viewing spot

You often make us repeat our words by saying "Heh?" and then, when we do, and you finally get it, you smile and say, "oh!"  You love to say "BYE" very loud and wave your little hand.  You say "Daddy, Bye" in the morning as we head out to school and then give an elaborate and adorable "BYE" to all of the teachers at Bright Eyes when I pick you up.  You delight in your brothers, who always make you laugh, and they are enjoying this new stage you are in as you are responsive to their little tricks.  They recently told you to "go tell mom you pooped your pants" and in to the kitchen you came running "mommy, pooped pants."  These 3 words had your brothers in stitches, which made you not only crack up but repeat the sentence again and again.  You have learned the word "fart" and laugh when you hear one, or even just the word. You are quick to entertain and once you get a response of laughter from any of us you will continue your little act.  You do silly dances and make daring moves (like jumping from the glass table to the couch) and your brothers and their friends get an absolute kick out of you.  They've taught you to play knee hockey, only you don't have to get on your knees, and to try to play Xbox.  You've also learned golf from Uncle Mat and, you love trying to talk to Alexa.  She doesn't respond to you yet but you crack up when we tell her "Simon says Decker you are cute" and she says "Decker you are cute".  We repeat this game with many adjectives.  When Alexa plays the Barney song or the Mickey Mouse song your eyes widen as if it is a gift just for you.

You skip when you walk, which makes me skip also.  Your voice rises on the end of every word just making whatever you are saying sound so very happy (like the pocket of joy that you are!)  Your smile is refreshing and your eyes are bright but there is nothing better than your laugh.  You laugh with your whole body and crack up into hysterics and it is impossible not to crack up also.  You weigh in at 27.2 pounds and stand at 33 3/4 inches.  It isn't always easy being the 4th son in our house.  We are very busy, often on the go, and our days are filled with a certain level of chaos even when things are calm. You are sometimes forced to fend for yourself, and we will find you playing nicely, doing puzzles, coloring, or looking through books.  I'll see you, and wish that I could join you for longer than a moment, and feel a little sad when I walk away to do laundry, start dinner, help with homework, run a carpool, clean up the kitchen, or anything else that someone needs, but I am happy that you are independent and content and happy.  And, Decker, you should know that no matter what we are doing, how busy we may be, how loud things can get, how many errands we must run, that you are loved beyond measure every single moment of every single day.  You bring all of us joy and laughter and a sense of peace.  You are the embodiment of good things, of true things, of real happiness and love, and I am thankful every single day for what you add to our family, to our lives.  I do not take credit for the joy that you are but I am certainly proud to be your mommy.  I love you Decker and I can't wait to see what this year brings.


Growing into the birthday shirt





Decker with his brothers and his "other brother, DT" on the frozen lake

Typically it is steps, beds, chairs he jumps off of- this is nothing

He didn't make the shot but he is working on that form

The sound of laughter.  "GO!"