The Tovsky Tribe

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Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Blood Brothers!

Ryder has a tendency to be a little difficult.  He is a good boy, who knows his manners, but sometimes forgets to use them.  He means well but sometimes get caught up in la la land.  He doesn't see the world in black and white, and therefore, everything has to be explored.   Although I admire this about my son, it can also be quite frustrating.

Today, Ryder was a superstar.  He was so well-behaved!  He listened so well!  He used his manners!   All the things he has a tendency to be difficult about (ie: going potty, getting dressed, leaving for school,) were of no issue today, at all.  It was wonderful.  I told him thousands of times how proud I was, how happy I was, how grateful I was.

Ryder is a sensitive boy.  He is imaginative and creative, and it would not surprise me if he was a poet later in life.  He has an extreme fondness for all things superhero and he adores the world of make believe.  His costumes, in particular his Spider-man costume, are his number one most important thing in his entire universe.  Costumes are his kryptonite.

If he is misbehaving and we say we will take away his costumes, he often stops the bad behavior.  Though, not always.  We also use a "new" costume as incentive, or, er, a bribe, for good behavior.   Hey, don't judge, whatever works!!!

He likes to put his Spider-man costume into little boxes.  He does this because Peter Parker does this in the movies.   Ryder loves to dress up like, and pretend to be, Peter.  Today, Ryder took both Spider-man costumes, folded inside of his Ryder "what used to be his markers" box to school.  Since he was behaving so well today, I didn't stop him.

At pickup this afternoon I was told how good Ryder was all day, how well he listened, how happy he was.   It really was a great day for him.  When he saw me he ran to me, like always, jumped into my arms, like usual, and gave me a great big hug.    My boys are always good for a real tight hug.  Then he looked at me and asked "Mommy, can I give Oren my Spider-man costume?"

I nearly fell to the floor.  Maybe because he almost knocks me down every time, but mostly because Ryder never wants to part with his costumes.  EVER.

I asked:  "You want to give Oren your costume?" and he responded: "yes, his is ripped and I said he could borrow mine!"  Shocked, I continued: "Of course you can, Ryder, but you realize you will be without it, right?"  He said "yes!"  And, so, he gave Oren the costume.

When we got home Jeff called and said "Oren has a Spider-man costume he claims Ryder gave him.  Did he take it from him?"  I assured Jeff that Ryder did, in fact, give Oren the costume.  I told Ryder how proud of him I was for sharing with a friend.  He said "Oren's my friend, it made him happy."

Now, the fact that, technically, it was Chase's costume he gave is irrelevant because Chase will not miss it.  And, Ryder does wear both.

As it turns out, this little act was a HUGE display of affection.  I never had a doubt that Oren was Ryder's best bud.  He loves that kid.  Chase does too, in fact.  The three of them are little bosom buddies.  Oren, interestingly, has things in common with both boys.

But, if there was ever a sign of a 4 year olds love for his buddy, if there was ever an expression of friendship, this is it.  The sharing of the favorite costume.  They might as well become blood brothers.

Yes, Ryder certainly had a very good day!!

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