Show n share

Show-n-Tell. That's what they called it back when I went to school. Back when you couldn't walk and talk on the phone at the same time without risk of snapping a cord.  Show-n-Tell. I know we had it, but I can't remember one thing I ever showed. Or told.  If I had to guess though, I would say a Smurf figurine was involved at least once.

Now it's called Show-n-Share, probably for some P.C. reason I am unaware of. Turner was up yesterday and he could bring anything he wanted so, of course, he chose his baby brother.  Yep, Decker was the "object" Turner shared with his kindergarten class. 

Proud as I've ever seen him, he sat in the front of the class holding his sleeping, 7-week old baby brother in his arms, smile beaming, ready to show him off to 16 excited 6 year olds.  Hands popped up almost instantly for questions and comments, most of which were a variation of "he's so cute!"  Only two questions were asked ("what is Decker's birthday", and "how much did he weigh at birth?") both by Mrs. Wagner, and only one was Turner able to answer without my help.  But, it didn't matter.  None of it mattered.  All that mattered was the pride Turner felt as a big brother, and the pride I felt as the momma witnessing all of this.

I have a feeling Turner won't ever forget this show-n-share, even 30 years down the road.  Nor will many of his classmates.  Decker, on the other hand, who slept the whole time, will only have this blog post as his memory.

Dork!!

I am a biased mom and I think my sons are gorgeous.  All of them.  I think they each offer something different to the eye and to the camera.  Although we are constantly complimented on each of the boys, Ryder, however, has always been the pretty boy.  The one that people notice, if they have to choose one.    Lately, with his desire for perfect clothes and perfect hair, he may be in the fast lane to Hollywood. 

But, then, he comes home with THIS school picture.   His hair is gelled, he is wearing a shirt, a tie, and a vest.  The combination could be awesome, or well....the opposite of that.   In this case, when you add the goofiest smile you can come up with you get....the class dork!  I never thought that would be his title but if you look at the Kindergarten picture it is possible that this is the consensus.  

We will be grateful he has another chance when he takes the enrichment picture at Ohev.   We will show this picture to his girlfriends, at his bar mitzvah, when he is crowned prom king, or just at his wedding.  But, for now, we will just laugh about it.   

Ryder had no opinion that he spoke of regarding this photo:

Chase missed picture day due to an illness.  He did not seem upset about it and I suppose being:  NOT PICTURED HERE is a slight promotion from class dork?

Kindergarten!

I am not usually a basket-case.  There is a long list of things you can call me: forgetful, sarcastic, late, to name a few.  But I am normally not a basket-case.  I don't tend to get worked up over little things and I often assume things are going to work out as they are supposed to.

Chase and Ryder started Kindergarten on Tuesday.  It was one day late due to the aftermath of Irene.
The night before (really, weeks before) the excitement started to build.  The boys went to bed hours past their bedtime because they couldn't stop jumping on their beds.

They picked out their clothes.   Ryder had picked out his clothes weeks in advance and was so excited that he could wear a tie on his first day.   Then laid in bed, together, apart, together, apart.   They did finally fall asleep.  I don't know what time.  They did sleep in separate beds.

The morning of I had a glimpse of what high school would be like since I had to wake them up.  When I did, Ryder rolled over, pulled his blanket over his head and gave me a groan that sounded like a dying frog.  Chase took a moment, a slow moment, then smiled and jumped out of bed, needing to be the first one ready.

The boys dressed themselves, wet, combed and gelled their own hair.  Their hair looked much better than my bathroom.  After a breakfast they didn't eat they ran outside for some pictures before heading to the bus stop.  The bus was the biggest part of their excitement.  Riding the big yellow school bus that, somehow, still, in this day and age, you can get away with riding without seatbelts, is a a huge milestone into big boyhood and that was, probably, the thing they were most excited for.

They rushed onto the bus, in front of the big kids, they never gave me hugs, not kisses, not even goodbyes (though, Chase did turn around and wave....to Todd!)  And, they were off.

And something didn't sit right for me.  Maybe it was that my babies were now in Kindergarten.   Maybe it was that they, for the first time, were being separated in school.  Maybe it was that my son was wearing a tie to school, on his first day of Kindergarten, and I feared he may get beat up.  Maybe it was knowing my boys were growing up, quickly, and didn't want to hug their mommy anymore.

In the end I think it was mommy's intuition for the fiasco that was about to happen.

The bus stop to school is right in front of our house.   This is a convenience that I know will prove its worth time and again as the years pass.   Their bus stop on the way home is at Ohev Shalom.  This is because you can only choose one stop and the boys will be doing enrichment there three days a week.  Ohev does not start until next week.  I told the boys several times that they were to go there after school and that I would meet them.  Yet, I was nervous.   I called the school to verify that this was the proper arrangement.  That they would, indeed, be dropped off at Ohev even though school was not in session.  They told me that was ABSOLUTELY the case.  In an out of character moment, I called twice, not convinced this was going to run smoothly.

I arrived at Ohev at 11:05.  The bus was not expected until 11:50.  I wasn't having a dyslexic moment...I was just nervous and arrived early.  Very out of character.  While waiting for those 45 minutes I paced.  Paced.   I was starting to think my body had been taken over by someone who didn't fly by the seat of her pants.  It turns out, I had reason to be nervous.  I knew what was going to happen before it did.   The bus driver did not drop the boys off at Ohev.  Even after I called a third time and they told me to stay put.    
It was 1.5 hours before I found my sons, my new kindergartners.  It was 1.5 hours later that I picked them up at Richboro Elementary School.  It was 1.5 hours later that I turned into a complete basket-case.

Like I said, I am not usually like that.  Perhaps it was the final straw on the not-so-great year we have been having.  Or it could have just been that my kids were lost for over an hour when they were under the care of their school.   It's just not supposed to happen that way.

In the end, we are all over it.  The boys recovered much faster than I did, as usual.  I had never been so grateful to have twins as I was during that mess, thrilled that they weren't alone for what they said was a "very long bus ride!"

Although this is a first day of Kindergarten I will not soon forget, for them it was an otherwise great day.  They both seemed happy with their teachers and their classes.  Neither of them seemed to be upset that they were separated.  They each made a new friend.  And, they both came home telling stories.  Particularly Ryder, who had much more to say on the topic than chatterbox Chase.

I hope they have a fantastic year.  I hope they make new friends and learn a lot.  I hope they carve their own paths and mold their own interests.  I hope that there is never another bussing snafu again.  I am not sure I can handle it.

Boys, you may be the little guys in the big school but you'll never be the little fish.  I have no doubt of all that you will be and all that you will accomplish and this is just one small step towards all that you deserve.  I am so very proud of both you and I love you so!!!

Not sure if this video portrays their actual excitement, but.....

Graduation?!

Yesterday was a monumental day. One which should have required an overdose of Prozac, but didn't because I am sticking to my plan of total DENIAL.

Chase and Ryder graduated from Pre-school. I understand a good part of the world does not even attend Pre-school so to insist this milestone is remarkable is just silly.

But, still, for me it was a bittersweet moment. Somehow my pre-mature babies have matured, leaving no indications of being preemies at all.  Despite being "young" for their class, and in spite of the red-shirting trend, Chase and Ryder are kindergarten ready.

I have mixed feelings about this.  Typical Jewish mother, I suppose. As I marvel in the boys that they have become and anticipate the men that they will be, I get weepy over their infant pictures and wonder how it all happened. So fast?    This is something I will battle with my whole life. First pre-school aisles then wedding aisles.

It was a hot and humid day for June.  Hot for August, even.  The only thing hotter than the air was Ryder, who had 103 fever when he woke up that morning.   Both boys had been so excited for the day, had counted down every day since June 1st. They knew what graduation meant, including the thrilling fact of 12 weeks of no school.  They had practiced their songs, rehearsed their walk, picked out their outfits (including a new shirt and red tie for Ryder!). They were ready.  There was no way he was missing this big day.  Even the teachers told me to dose him up and bring him in. 

So we did. 


And, he was a trooper.

The boys walked the aisle, hand in hand, mortar boards atop their heads.   They sang their songs, smiled occasionally, and joined their friends in the shouting of everyone's names during the slideshow.  Then, one by one, each child was called up to receive their diploma and the obligatory hug from the teachers they so adored (and who adored them right back!)

After, we headed over to "the other side" of the sanctuary for an Oneg.  No Jewish event is complete without one no matter how light the spread.

We went home for more food and enjoyed lunch with the family, gifts, and some rest before the busy night of final soccer practices and first recitals.

Entertaining the graduates

It was a fantastic day and I have yet to shed a tear.    Maybe it's knowing I am free of the double tuition that's bringing me joy on such occasions.

First day of pre-school, ever!  My how they grew!!

A Politician, A Rock Star, and a Mother Weak for her Boys.

Last week we had parent/teacher conferences at the boys school.  For some reason, standing outside of the closed door waiting my turn almost felt as if I was heading into the Principal's office.   There were no surprises about what I would come to hear, yet for some reason I felt a bit nervous.  Turner's conference went as I posted here.

Chase and Ryder's conference was interesting.  As they are finishing up their Pre-K year and getting ready to head out into the real world of Public School I sometimes, OK maybe a bit more often than that, get nervous.  Since they day I gave birth to boys with Summer birthdays I have been asked the question of "Will I hold them back?"   At first I was unsure to what all of these nosy and inquiring minds were referring.  As I had mentioned, people seemed to ask me, a new mom to twins, some really absurd and personal questions.  Hold them back as they started to crawl?  Push them down when they started to walk?  Had I known then that Ryder would climb walls and dart through parking lots maybe I would have held them back on such obvious milestones.  But, it seemed, they wanted to know if I would hold them back in school.   I was just hoping to get them off of formula first, perhaps get them out of diapers, before I started thinking about kindergarten cut-offs.  But, really, the world thought I should I start thinking about these things.
So, with the peanut gallery constantly whispering in my ear, and the apparent new trend of red shirting kindergarten making headlines (and here, and here), the question began to sink in.  And, there I was, ignoring the obvious signs of readiness, and instead debating the smaller things.  They are really little.  And, it would make a huge difference in sports.  And, they were premature, you know?  Besides, are they ready for such a big school, such a big world?  They are little, Jewish boys, heading into the Non-Jewish world.  Will their charm take them anywhere?  This is all crap.  I know that.  I am only half crazy.  The other half tells me that every five year old boy and girl sets out to the world of Kindergarten.  They all survive.  Even if they don't like it.

Of course, Chase and Ryder will do more than survive.  They are ready for the big school.  They are mature beyond their young age, and despite being nearly 9 months younger than some of their classmates, most of the time you can not tell. Academically, socially, emotionally, they are ready!   I guess the big question is, am I?

So, I set into Miss Liz's classroom and this is what I was told:

She likes to call Chase the Mayor.  She is convinced he has a future in Politics.  Or Negotiating.  Or both.  He is a "person of the people" who will greet each and every one of them, make sure they are all happy, speak for them when (and even if not) necessary, and will make his rounds to everyone in the classroom.   He does this at parties, too.  Actually, he does this everywhere. He gets this trait from Todd.

He showed a good amount of improvement in almost all areas being assessed.  Chase listens intently and has astounding recall, for both concepts and details.  He loves the game hangman (and is pretty good,) does really well with rhyming, knows all of his letters, their sounds, and can name a word that starts with each letter, and can also count to 100.

There are some areas he continues to need development in, in addition to some gross motor skills, such as accepting constructive criticism, not always being the center of attention, and tattling.  None of this came as a surprise.

That aside, Chase always has a smile, a laugh, and a hug to offer.  He is well-liked and likes everybody, though he does seem to play more with the boys.  He is eager, loves to share his knowledge, and above all else he is driven and determined like she has never seen in an almost five year old little boy.   Miss Liz believes that Chase will be successful in life not because he is smart (which he is) or charming (which he is, as well) but because he needs to be the best, he needs to be number one, he doesn't like losing.  Although I was aware he was competitive, I was a bit surprised to hear that it was to this degree.   Admirable, perhaps, but it sounds a bit stressful.  Clearly, he did not get the trait from me.  He must get that from Todd, as well.  Or my dad.  Or Todd's dad.   I never liked being number one.  Not because I couldn't or because I didn't want to try that hard but because number one meant a whole lot of attention.  I was not interested in attention.  At all.  The more I write this the more I realize that maybe Chase is not my son.

Ryder is a different boy, totally.  One of the things I was most happy about Miss Liz as a teacher was that right from the very beginning she knew the differences in the boys and never expected them to be the same.  She knows them, she understands them, and for that I am so grateful.

She describes Ryder as the handsome boy, leather clad on a motorcycle.  Untouchable yet desirable.  Mysterious yet so sweet.  A budding rock star and poet.  Though this description is accurate it makes me a bit uncomfortable.   She described the guys I crushed all of growing up.  Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth there.

Ryder is a free-spirit who is independent and not influenced to conform.  He is creative, and imaginative, and thoughtful, and deep.  He is well-liked and likes everyone but tends to form strong, deep, friendships and show a favoritism to those friends.  He enjoys the company of boys, and particularly those that share his interests.  He sounds a lot like me!  He laughs, he smiles, he is kind, and though rambunctious, he is also sensitive and caring.

He did show improvement in most areas evaluated since the assessment in the Fall.  He knew all of his letters, completed all of his rhymes, and also has pretty good recall, when he wants to.  Surprisingly, he could not count to 100, which both Miss Liz and I believe he can (know he can) but figure he may have lost focus along the way.  He has a tendency to do that.  Did I mention he reminds me of, well, me?

He has very well developed fine motor skills, and is an agile and flexible boy.  He has beautiful handwriting, and enjoys it, always wanting to write everything.  He loves art, and seems to have a developing talent.  He is passionate and faithful and loyal and yet, still, easy going enough to mix in with anyone.  He loves to laugh and to smile and a karate chop to the head is often a sign of love.

He could use continued improvement in the areas of listening to what he is being told, focusing, and making choices that don't just benefit him, but the class as a whole.  Unlike his driven brother, Ryder doesn't get bothered by being less than the best.  He likes to do the best he can, for him, not for anyone else.  He has talents and he uses them but not for the purposes of recognition.  He is much less interested in that sort of attention.  Yes, it turns out, Ryder is clearly my son.

Overall, it has been a great year for both kids.   We believe they will both benefit, even if at first they struggle, by being separated at school, where they can hone in on their individuality without the pressure of the other one.   I know that they will always have their special bond and being a twin will always be a huge part of who they are, but they could each use a chance to be one without the other, at least during the school day.

Miss Liz believes they are both ready for Kindergarten and despite their being a late birthday or smaller than the average boy, they will fit in exactly where they belong.  So, to answer the question of all those nosy strangers, red may be Ryder's favorite color but this is one red-shirt he won't be wearing.  "NO!  WE WILL NOT BE HOLDING THEM BACK IN SCHOOL!"

There is about three weeks left in the school year, at the safe haven of a Jewish Pre-school where the teachers and students alike find them funny, and adorable, and smart.  I will spend the summer preparing MYSELF for my little guys to ride on a great big bus, in a great big school, surrounded by great big kids.   Lucky for me, or for them, I am sure they can handle themselves with those bigger kids because this mama is not sure she ca.   Mistreat my boys and those silly bands you wear on your wrist will become a weapon which I will use against you.  Oh, I will.   I am weak for these boys.