A Letter to my Son on his 18 Month Birthday!

Dear Decker,





18 months, happy.  Although it is true I don't get to write these letters monthly, or even quarterly, it is also true that every month that passes, passes by happy.

The thing about you being a year and a half is that it is one of the most difficult phases we must deal with as parents.  I say this even amidst the mouthiness of tween-agers and the social issues that come along with being in 5th grade.  It is possible that I am forgetting, for the moment, about three year old tantrums, but we will go with this phase being the most difficult, being that we are in it, for purposes of this letter.  You are everything I expected from a toddler, everything I remember your brothers being...only more.  You are a climber, a mover, a shaker, a toucher, a feeler, a jumper, a runner, and a literal button pusher.  You have a physical capability that is amazing, and though I have grasped your capability and have almost embraced it most people are scared to death when they see how you climb to the top of the jungle gym and stand on the end, or walk parking curbs like a balance beam.  You can unscrew lids, do zippers, open doors, and are working on the buckles of your car seat. You are unbelievably strong and can hold your own in a tug of war with daddy or I or any of your brothers.  You mimic their every move and have shadow practiced your baseball swing and throw, your hockey swing, even a frisbee toss.  You try to dribble a basketball and do so pretty well considering, well, that you are one.  You can throw anything with straight projection and good velocity and can do so with both hands.  And, you are one hell of a little soccer player; capable of dribbling with both feet, kicking mid-stride, and striking a ball directly into a goal which is always a followed with both hands in the air and a "yyyaaaayyy!"

To the masses it's your eyes, your curls, your face that gets noticed and, literally, stops admirers in their step.  And, there is no doubt, that your blue eyes are bright and shine from your happy soul; your curls are long, and flowing, and enviable; your face is soft and pretty and dimpled, but to all of us who know you we understand that those physical attributes are not what make you WHO you are. You are a light in a room, a bounce in a step, a rare blooming flower on a warm winter's day. You are made up of a blend of unique and wonderful joys, like the look of delight that settles on your face and your smile with each small accomplishment. You are the way you excitedly nod your head for even the most simple of Yes's. And, it is the way you throw your head back, with your mouth open, and give a full belly laugh that causes laughing fits to anyone around you.  It is your persistent need to do and to learn and your impeccable understanding of words you can not say.  It is the way you grab a hold of my hand and take me to where ever it is you want to be and the way you smile when you see someone you love and give "huggies" upon request.  It is the way that you applaud small joys. And how, at a call for kisses, you pucker up your lips and will grace whatever lips come your way or how you suck in your cheeks to pucker up for fishy kisses. It is your "heh?" that is repeated after everything that is said to you, that should be annoying yet, coming from you, is somehow cute even if it does make me question your hearing.  It is the way you lay your head on my shoulder when you're ready for bed and will tap your hand on my back as we sing through the "D-E-C-K-E-R" song.  It is your love for books and the way you grab a few and crawl onto my lap to read them.  And, it is your love for puzzles and your need to keep trying until you solve them.  It is how you follow your brothers around and watch everything they do, and even more, it is the way they are with you- how you can get them to stop, to quiet, and to embrace you even when they are mid-moment of boy hyper.  It's all of this that makes you Decker and, though I take no credit for these attributes (they were truly gifted to you,) I feel privileged every day to have an opportunity to watch you grow and help cultivate the personality that is brewing and the person you are becoming.


Decker, at one and a half, you love books, and balls, and bubbles, and iphones.  You can navigate my phone swiftly and easily finding your apps within your folder and swiping right through each game. Unforyunately, however, you will throw an absolute tantrum if we take it away from you.  You love the playground.  The swings always get you laughing and you can never get enough of the sliding board.  You like yogurt, love your milk, and love applesauce. You prefer to feed yourself with both spoon and fork (in spite of the mess that causes) and are improving with that skill each day.  You sleep well, and often times will point right to your crib when it is time to go to bed.  We will lay you down on your soft, blue blanket and you will outstretch your arms and grab the ends and pull them in to your chest to cuddle.  It is just the cutest thing I have ever seen, and quite funny, since you are not a cuddler...not at all.  No, you do not like to cuddle (though you are happy to give hugs) and don't really like to be held, as you want to be able to be moving and doing at all times.

We took away the iphone!

You have a few words you use regularly; more and milk (both said while also using the sign); ball, and book and dad.  You say "Ry-yer" which is what you call all 3 of your brothers (though you used to call all 3 "Seis".)  Most of the other words that you have said; yes, fish, banana, bubble, lawn mower, Turner, Mama, you use sparingly.  Much like I remember Ryder being at a similar age, you seem to learn a word and then store it in your mind. You will start to use them all, possibly at once, at a later date.  For now, you communicate quite well with a string of grunts and noises and points and always seem to get what you need.

At 18 months you weigh 24.4 pounds and are 32.5 inches long, though that length is inaccurate considering you wouldn't sit still long enough to measure. You are light but solid and strong.  Your muscles have a definition that many of us could only wish for and you are coordinated and graceful in your movements.

We are busy and often on the go.  Between work and school and activities I often feel I don't get enough time to just be with you and that is why I cherish the Tuesdays that we have together.  And, though Tuesday is my favorite day, as I get to be with you, I am pretty sure your favorite day is the time you spend with Uncle Mat! No matter how busy or how hectic our life can be,you are the calm in our storm, the light in our day.  You keep me on my toes and are always in to something and I can't wait to see what is to come as we go through the days together.

I love you so......

First day of school

By the lake

Your Friday's with Uncle Mat!

One day, you pointed and grunted at this picture of daddy and Cousin Jaime until I handed it to you. Once I did, you looked at it, pointed at daddy and said "Da" then you pointed at Jaime, looked at me, and gave Jaime a kiss.  You know who he is without ever meeting him!!!

Turner at 18 months

So, this is twin toddlerhood

Chase and Ryder at 18 months

A letter to my sons on their 18th Month Birthday!

Dear Chase and Ryder,

One and a half years old. What happened to my baby boys? Occasionally I see signs of the infants you once were, but mostly you are these toddlers who light up my world.
This age is certainly challenging, as most toddlers are. Most recently, Chase, you dumped a box of cornmeal on the floor and both of you played in it as if you were on the beach. Things like that do not stress me out so much, as that is exactly what kids should be doing. It is when you are running in opposite directions in a parking lot, after I ask you to hold my hand, that really gets to me. We are managing however. We are all figuring it out.
At 18 months Ryder you have began teething again. You have four teeth, in addition to your two year molars, left to get and they must be working their way in. Chase you still have 5 teeth. It is actually amusing to see your more than half empty mouth. Your weigh in is not scheduled for another week, but it seems you have both gotten taller, as shirts and pants are all getting shorter.
Ryder, you continue to be adventurous and daring. You still climb on everything, only this month that included out of the crib. We now have your crib tented to keep you safe. You actually seem to love the tent and are often zipping yourself in. You are never discouraged when you fall on your head, which I must admit is kind of often. Chase, your language skills continue to increase. We are beginning to have mini conversations with you, though I am not always sure the information you are telling me is accurate. Ryder, you know how to ask nicely for things, though your please is often in sign language. It is cute the way you give a little smile and bat your eyes when you do the please motion. You have added a word to your vocabulary, "tar" which is actually guitar. You carry the one Uncle Mat gave you all over the house and love strumming it. You do ask me to play too, which is funny, since I have no clue. But, you do not know that:)
You are both going through a phase of not eating quite as well as you once did. Some meals are fantastic, some meals are less than so, but you do not let yourself go hungry. Lately, you have been sitting back in your booster seats for meals, which has been helpful.
We began music class again today. I am still on the fence as to whether we will enroll in the full session. The last session, Ryder, you did not seem to enjoy it to its fullest, spending most of the time sneaking out of the classroom. I am hoping, now that you have fallen in love with the guitar and have recently learned to dance, that you will enjoy it a bit more this session. Chase, you always like music class and I imagine you will again.
The holiday season was a fun time for all. We spent Christmas Day hosting a brunch which included 16 kids. You both had a good time. We then spent 5 relaxing days in Margate and rang in the New Year at Brett and Sue Pinto's home in Margate. You both partied until after 10:30pm and a good time was had by all. All that time off, however, led to a lack of routine making it quite difficult to get back into the swing of things.
Ryder, you are fixated on the buckles on your booster seat. Once we take you out of your seat you then re-buckle both yours and your brother's seat. You are always very proud of yourself and often applaud after you hear the snap. You love it when we applaud with you. You still go nuts for buttons, remotes, televisions, phones and computers, or as you call them "FWA." You are extremely independent, play well by yourself, and are very laid back. You are determined and persevere and do not give up quickly when you concentrate. You have also learned how to open closed doors and are quite nimble with the door knob. The fact that you are about an inch shorter than Chase has not served as a disadvantage since he still can't do it. It is becoming more and more difficult to keep you in one room.
Chase your verbal skills continue to amaze us, you love to be tickled and your personality is extremely extroverted. You are bit more aggressive and are often the one to bully your brother. You want your way and are still learning a lesson in sharing and waiting your turn. You always know when you have poopie and never fail to tell us and you love taking showers. You love Elmo, Cookie, Ernie and Oscar, and will get excited to watch Sesame Street, though you usually only sit for a few minutes. You love to be tickled and belly laugh when it happens, it is just adorable. Ryder you are not quite as ticklish as your brother, but when we hit the spot your laugh echoes. Your voices are so sweet, Chase's is a bit more high pitched than Ryders, and like your cries or your moans, we can tell who's voice belongs to who.
Ryder, you have this thing you do when you say Pop-Pop or Poppy...you whisper it. We are not sure why, but you do it every time and it makes us laugh. It is the only words, so far, that you whisper. You both recognize all family members when you see them and will point them individually in pictures. You both love the playground and are extremely agile and quick. Chase you are a bit more tenative at the playground and it seems you may be a bit scared of heights, though it never stops you. Ryder, you do not seem to be scared of much at all.
You seem to understand most of what we tell you and generally you are pretty well behaved. Although it is Ryder who needs to be climbing the walls, it is actually Chase who tests us a bit more. When you are given a time out in the corner, you will go stand there yourself. Although I count to 10 out loud you never stay there for that long.
Chase, you had an ear infection this month and you were perfectly yourself through it all. It was kind of random that we found out you had it, we would never had known. You loved taking your antibiotic.
Chase you are also very concerned about Ryder. You ask for him, say his name, and make sure he has what he needs, at all times.
Ryder you are starting to develop a bit of your brother's flirt as you are starting to wave hello and goodbye a bit more, and love to blow kisses. You will play peek-a-boo any opportunity you get. Chase, you love to hide. You will hide in closets, behind furniture, in corners. You are amazingly patient until someone finds you.
We went for your second hair cut and you seemed to love it. Neither one of you whined, cried, or even got upset. In fact, Chase, you asked for more when the girl was done cutting.
It is amazing how much can grow and change in one short month. You are exhausting and delightful and it seems to be that you are a pleasure for most to be around. No doubt, it is a pleasure for me and I cherish my time with you. Despite some difficult days I am well aware how quickly you will grow.

Your smiles are warming, your laughs are contagious, and you are my precious boys.

I love you so.

Mommy